"I did not blueprint the prepackaged prison give me, of self-centered, self-interested materialism. But I built it. Then I scoff at those who made real sacrifices - politically, socially, or spiritually, in a shallow attempt to please my peers, and I call them phonies. The friend addressing me in the song is Vraja Kishor das of 108. The question in the last two lines is directed at you, my dear friends. I'm not saying be a Krishna devotee, a Muslim, or a punk-rock kid. Be you. Seek a true alternative to the 9-to-5 scam, armed with knowledge of history, and of yourself." - Ryan Downey, 1995.
A few notes (2023):
"nails in His hands" - Jesus Christ (Christian Gospel)
"a 100-pound chain 'round His neck" - Baháʼu'lláh (Bahá'í Faith)
"an arrow to the foot" - Krishna (Hinduism)
"gunned by Armenian men" - The Báb (Bábism)
Regardless of whether one views them as teachers, healers, leaders, mystics, myths, or manifestations of the divine, the prophets of different religious traditions undoubtedly carried weightier burdens than most of us, particularly if we see them as avatars for our collective tribulations.
"Christopher-come-to-boss-us" is a phrase inspired by Jamaican Rastafari dub poet Mutabaruka (Allan Hope), primarily the song "Columbus Ghost" from the 1994 album Melanin Man.
COINTELPRO was a series of covert counterintelligence efforts conducted by the F.B.I. designed to surveil, infiltrate, discredit, and disrupt activist organizations, including the Brown Berets, Black Panther Party, United Farm Workers, American Indian Movement, and other groups on both the far left and far right of American politics.
"Into the dust, the heap of the depraved" was a play on this quote from Leon Trotsky: "You are pitiful, isolated individuals! You are bankrupts. Your role is played out. Go where you belong from now on – into the dustbin of history!" I certainly wasn't lionizing Trotsky as a personal hero. I simply adopted the idea of a "dustbin of history."
"You see it's like a picture - the negative reverses" refers to an idea summarizing Howard Zinn's A People's History of the United States, which offers something of a "reverse American exceptionalism" interpretation of America. Granted, it's reductive in its own right. But as a 20-year-old Hoosier in the early 90s, Zinn's work was important for me, as I began to untangle traditionally accepted narratives and uncover alternative viewpoints on race, gender, class, and history.
Vraja Kishor (Vic Dicara) of the band 108 published a fanzine containing lyrics and song explanations for 1994's Songs of Separation album, which greatly inspired/encouraged me to do the same for the Hurst demo. Some of the lyrics in "burden" are a conversation of sorts, "answering" questions raised by Vic in the 108 lyric zine in the pages of my own.
lyrics
this ragged umbrella no longer shelters me
from the lonely eyes and cries of worldly lunacy
this tightrope circus line strangles me
bordering, teetering, on insanity
and I carried a burden. didn't beg for release.
I didn't blueprint these prison grounds but
they were constructed by me
they carried a burden. didn't beg for release.
witness to unspeakable horrors compared to our lives of ease
nails in His hands.
a 100 pound chain 'round His neck
An arrow to the foot
Or gunned by Armenian men
carried our burden, yet we ignore it
we choose not to think about it
it unnerves us
carried your burden
of your dusty-dime, forgotten self
buried your costume, and your head
we choose not to think about it
it unnerves you
in 1492, Christopher-come-to-boss-us
In 1972, COINTELPRO to toss us
into the dust, the heap of the depraved
they hand us the shovels to dig our graves
how can we live as we truly are? (As One)
can we erase his story's scars?
if we don't know the lessons our past has to teach us
then we are doomed, doomed to repeat it
reshuffle the heroes and villains that control our minds
you see it's like a picture, the negative reverses
if they're our 'founding fathers' than we're all bastard sons
bastard sons, and daughters, of those same 'founding fathers'
"so what's your plan to save your ass from the 9-to-5 scam?"
you mean the 9-to-5 jail, the 9-to-5?
"what's your plan?" asked my friend. "to save your ass?"
I don't have a plan! And I just don't know!
what's your plan?
how heavy is your burden?
what's your plan to save your ass?
how heavy is it?
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